How a 3 year-old is helping me make sense of the world

Can you remember the last time you had a brand new, completely unique experience? You know, the kind of moment when you had to struggle to make sense of the world?

Sometimes we find ourselves struggling to make something fit into our frame of reference, to make sense of what we are experiencing. It happens less as we age and I’d bet money that most of us have said (at least once) “Nothing surprises me anymore!”

But last week, I witnessed someone experience something that was so overwhelming, so confusing, that they struggled to make sense of it. What was this momentous occasion you may ask?

Little B met Rufus.

The family had gathered for a dinner to celebrate my father-in-law’s birthday. That in itself is not unusual, but there was someone there who doesn’t usually join us for those dinners. Rufus. Rufus was there and Rufus is a wonder. At least, he was certainly a wonder to three year-old Little B.

Rufus is a 160lb-ish Great Dane. He is magnificent in size and stature. If you are sitting at the table and Rufus happens to walk up to stand beside you and you turn your head, you are looking eye to eye. He’s a big dog.

Rufus was obediently laying in the corner when Little B arrived with his family. He was drawn to Rufus like a moth to a flame. He crouched down beside Rufus and stroked his head. The adults were all watching like hawks because Rufus doesn’t spend a lot of time around little people, but he behaved himself beautifully.

Little B kept stroking Rufus’ head, but when Rufus stood up, Little B’s eyes got big and he looked at the adults and solemnly announced, “It’s a horse-cow.”

“No sweetie, Rufus is a dog.”

Little B just shook his head and said, “Nope. He’s a horse-cow.”

We laughed, of course, because it was funny. Here was this tiny little person, shorter than Rufus and about one quarter of Rufus’ weight, shaking his head at the adults, no doubt thinking we were pulling his leg because no way was that a dog.

Not once did any of us manage to convince Little B that Rufus was a dog. I think at one point he called Rufus a horse-dog-cow, but it clearly didn’t sit well with him because he went back to calling Rufus a horse-cow.

The rapt fascination on that little boy’s face was a wonder to behold. But clearly, somewhere between three and five, enough learning occurs that five year-old J recognizes that even if the dog is bigger than any dog he’s ever seen before, he still understands that it is a dog, just a really big one. And it isn’t as though Little B has never seen a big dog, he has one at home. Their family dog, Ruby, is a Boxer/English Mastiff cross. Ruby is a big, sturdy girl, but she’s not as big as Rufus.

Little B took all of his three years of knowledge and understanding and applied it to the situation, came up with, in his mind at least, a plausible explanation and carried on.

There are some things going on in the world lately that are outside the realm of experience of many of us and we have been struggling to make sense of them. Some of these issues aren’t new, they are age-old problems that we continue to struggle with. We take all of our life experience and learning and apply it to what’s going on in our effort to make sense of things and it seems, to me at least, that there are as many different perspectives as there are people wondering about things.

I don’t have any brilliant answers to the problems plaguing our world, but maybe some of the answer is found in watching a little boy make sense of something new. Maybe we need to have a really good look, take a little time to think objectively, do our best to make sense of things, and then keep on showing a little love.

It’s something to think about at least.

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